If the thought of a new BMW M 440i Coupe doesn’t make the adrenalin flow, there’s no hope for you and you might as well get your sprung walking stick and take to the fells.
At first sight – just hard beauty: priority of form mirrors elegance of engineering. Breathe deeply and gulp, because this car has the looks and the presence to encompass – and even surpass – the promised performance. It`s as good as current technology can make it,
Studiously classy without being flashy, no traces of extrovert flamboyance have been allowed to penetrate that fortress of Teutonic urbanity. The M 440i Coupe displays a coherence of spirit and metal that nothing from rivals can approach. And for me, a long forgotten sensation of heady excitement returned as I inhaled the intoxicating charisma. It promised motoring delights and past thrills that I thought were irrecoverable. In today’s conformist world it represents an elixir of excitement. This is (if you will permit the cliche) a ‘drivers car’
‘No car is worthy of such a hyperbolic build up’ I hear you complain. ‘What sort of car is he talking about here?’ you ask. It’s not a sports car, but a four-wheel-drive coupe.
The answer is to drive it and you will marvel at how an experience that is so easy, can be so distinguished. Yet the essential elements of driving enjoyment have not been lost..
I’ll tell you something. Are you sitting comfortably? Are you fortunate enough to be comfortably off? Do you deserve due reward for your labours? Last but not least: are you a purist when it comes to sheer motoring satisfaction? Well then, here is a valuable piece of advice. It’s this: grab your coat and get your hat and don’t forget your wallet. Just head to the BMW showroom. There, if you are lucky, you’ll find a car you might imagine money can’t buy: wrapped up in a punchy package of unadulterated opulent high tech. I’m talking about the new BMW M 440i XDrive Coupe variant which starts at £60,725.
From every which way it looks the part. A sleek, racy-raked thoroughbred ready to switch on the 374bhp at your command. Yet it’s so vice free that you won’t find a more user-friendly motor for mundane pottering too.
You’ll find the new BMW is acceptable everywhere: even into the purified purlieus of zealous mayors and their increasingly punitive proscriptions. Best of all if you are lucky enough to be extended a liberty enhancing invitation to unrestricted autobahns, you’ll find that it is very much in its element.
Inside this two door, four seat coupe you sit fairly low in a whisper quiet cocoon that’s as accommodating as a luxury suite. You have every electronic aid you need – and for your delight there’s a ‘lots of watts’ top quality sound system
Put simply, this new M Series is as swift as the wind, as supple as a gymnast: and good old intelligent four wheel drive ensures extra safety. The 3.0 litre, in-line six cylinder powerhouse of a petrol (remember that) engine is as smooth as silk and can take you to 155mph ( sensibly restricted, of course, but potentially, if unmuzzled, capable of taking you to warp speed of around 170mph for the criminally insane ) as the eight speed automatic transmission imperceptibly does its work. As for stopping, it boasts brakes that pull you up like an arrester cable on the USS Enterprise. All this and yet it returns around 35 mpg overall with 40 mpg plus when driving unnaturally gently. The chassis has, of course, all the necessaries to give brilliant dynamics and the sumptuous cabin has all the electronics watching over you to ensure you are protected from getting out of control if you are clumsy in your driving because you are so comfy and relaxed…..get the picture?
I took it for a drive. Duty bound to be objective, I looked hard for faults. I confess doubt grew about the stringback driving gloves: that was until I realised they belonged to me. They gripped the best steering wheel I’d gripped for years because it controlled with deft precision and satisfying feel, a tautly set-up muscular athlete of a car – but yet a machine that springs no surprises.
Naturally I explored the dynamic abilities and I have to tell you that if you pull the trigger in ‘Sport Plus’ mode you embark upon a ballistic adventure. Should Aunt Maud be your passenger in the comfy and spacious rear compartment, then selecting ‘Rigor Mortis Parsimony’ mode will waft her serenely to the vicar’s wife’s tea party.
No matter what, you are held comfortably in place on the road. No less assuredly, the supportive and cosseting seats guarantee creature comforts.
Engineering and design parameters, quality and performance are, in my opinion better than some Germanic rivals which – at much higher prices – are badged delusions worshipped only by the impressionable. To be blunt, it will ‘blitz’ some Porsche models. As for a Mercedes CLE…well…just try one and feel the difference.
This BMW is pitched at those who see nothing wrong with a little impish indulgence and who are also canny enough to recognise true qualities. The M440i delivers a knockout punch to rival manufacturers who must be left gasping for breath. It generates new excitement, garnering accolades. It’s called ‘going places’.
